Putting Thanksgiving in perspective

November 27, 2024 20 Comments

Thanksgiving is Americans favorite holiday.

Illustration by Adobe Stock

That’s according to a survey I just made up, but I think it’s true.

Despite the thanks-to-God aspect of it, it is nondenominational, with each of us free to thank our own God, and atheists to mock belevers in “the bearded white man in the sky” because they have no Golden Rule.

You know — do unto others.

At first thought, I would say Christmas is Numero Uno — who doesn’t like Christmas?

Well, many followers of other religions, who see Jesus as a prophet, maybe, but certainly not as the son of God.

Personally, I feel Christmas is an American holiday, because it is a federally-recognized day off from work. Even as a Jew, I appreciated the holiday spirit, and, of course, the exchange of gifts.

Personally, again, growing up, Thanksgiving was not a big deal. 

I preferred Hanukkah (back when it was spelled Chanukah) and Passover.

As you probably know, Hanukkah is not the “Jewish Christmas.” It got to be called that because it often falls near Christmas (it is a floating holiday because it is marked on the Jewish calendar, different from our Gregorian calendar), and also involves gifts for the kids. 

Passover in yiddish is a gantseh megilleh, meaning a big deal. 

The family gathers around the dinner table, called a seder, and usually the patriarch reads the Haggadah, which is the story of the Jews exodus from bondage in Egypt. 

Jews have been engaging in this annual celebration of freedom since before the birth of Jesus. You don’t have to believe in the literal truth of every line in the story to appreciate the historical lineage that when you sit at the seder table you are engaging in the same ritual performed by your ancestors for hundreds of generations.

The same is true for Christians celebrating Jesus’ birth.

On the other hand, Thanksgiving is a junior leaguer, only a few hundred years old, and celebrated officially only in a handful of countries. 

Yet, in the States, it is a biggie.

It is centered around the 2 Fs — Food, and Family. Mostly the latter.

Food you can get anywhere, and it is no accident that national travel burdens are heaviest around Thanksgiving, even more so than Christmas, according to a survey I did not make up.

Before World War II, by and large, almost all Americans spent their entire lives about 20 miles from where they were born. 

In the post-war boom, suburbs were invented, and America became mobile thanks to the automobile. People were no longer anchored to the very tree under which they were born.

Even while that is true, only 20% of Americans live more than two hours by car from Mom. That’s more than 66 million Americans.

And a lot of them head home for Thanksgiving.

And when they get there, in additional to turkey, or ham, sweet potato casserole, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, pumpkin pie, they will find — family.

(There’s a third F — football, but I am passing on that.)

As I grow older, family becomes more important to me.

Through my entire life, I always had demanding, time-consuming jobs, which I loved. And I prioritized profession over personal, work over family. I laughed at the observation that no one on his deathbed regretted not spending more time at the office.

I’m not laughing so much any more, now that I am in what some call the golden years. I have outlived my life expectancy and I’m careful not to walk toward bright white lights.

I have never been closer to my wonderful sister, now the family’s matriarch, and a better person than I could ever hope to be.

In saluting the Royal Air Force during the Battle for Britain, Winston Churchill said “never was so much owed by so many to so few.” I feel, speaking for the family, the same about my sister. She has done so much for so many, it can’t be detailed here. We all know.

This Thanksgiving, it will be a smaller gathering, at my sister-in-law’s home, with my wife, son- and daughter-in-law and my best friend. I give thanks for all of them, and also for my son, daughter, and granddaughters, who can’t be with us this year.

But then, as right now, I will be thinking of those not present, including those no longer living. The generations past, I had mentioned.

I will feel their presence, and be thankful for it.

20 thoughts on “Putting Thanksgiving in perspective”

  3. With the annual wishbone pull about to occur in countless homes around the US, let’s regard that wishbone as a perfect symbol of the political sanity that we crave. That bone has a left and right side; and it is perfectly centered on the carcass. No matter how big the bird, the right side of the wishbone is not so far from the left side. And, without each side, the wishbone is irrelevant and the competitive tug never happens.

    In many years past, I’ve seen the wishbone pull jettisoned in favor of preserving the bone to hang on the upcoming Christmas tree as a special adornment – dipped in gold, silver or other colorful paint. I recall seeing some trees displaying chicken and turkey wishbones. Quite festive. Maybe subconsciously, those families looked at the colorful wishbones as symbolizing their family wish to remain centered, while opposite sides remained permanently joined.

  6. As a single guy on Thanksgiving I buy a hoagie and sit in my living room or (parlor) as we called it in the old days, with my TV remote and watch numerous football games. Christmas is my favorite holiday/holy day when I spend the day with my loved ones. Happy Thanksgiving to Stu and to my fellow posters including democrats, republicans and others. Enjoy your Thanksgiving and God Bless you all and your loved ones.

  7. I loved celebrating Thanksgiving while growing up in Southwest Philadelphia. Not now, though, as I grow old in Southwest Florida. The weather is too nice, and the snowbirds, pilgrims with Minnesota and New York accents are too plentiful. 🙂

  8. Happy Thanksgiving Stu. I’ll add you forgot the third “F”, that’s only come about a few short decades ago—football! My school, Northeast High still battles Central High every Thanksgiving morning. Been at it since around 1895 or so.

  9. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on Thanksgiving. In my late teens and early twenties, Thanksgiving was a non-event because I was working as a mailer for the Inky. As you know, the Thanksgiving Inky was always the largest paper of the year and I worked the full week as the buildup to that. Worked Thanksgiving Eve from 9 pm- to 5:30 am (Double time and a half!) Got home, got a few hours sleep, and returned for the 3- 11 shift. Back then, the Company provided turkey sandwiches for all the mailroom workers. At some later point, the bean counters eliminated this cool perk. Anyway, Thanksgiving has a more significant meaning to me, but I will always remember those crazy nights at the Inquirer.

    1. Mike M., what you said about the Inquirer reminded me of back in the early to mid 60s I would purchase the Thanksgiving additions of the Philadelphia Daily News the Philadelphia Inquirer and the Evening and Sunday Bulletin all of which published their biggest newspapers on Thanksgiving mostly because of the advertisements. I really enjoyed looking through them and to me it was kind of heralding in the Christmas season. I think back to being with my family. We were poor as far as money was concerned but extremely happy as far as our family was concerned. In fact I’ve gotten a bit misty eyed thinking about those times past.

  11. Our Italian American celebrations of Thanksgiving were remarkable in that there was always lots of shouting, hugging, arguing, eating, drinking, and general hell raising, Remarkably, no family member ever shot or stabbed another.

  12. Born at Misericordia( 54 th & Cedar)in 1956 grew up in Manoa(Havertown), I am Thankful that most of my family and my buddies are all within 10 -70 miles of where Mom was from.
    This year I’m in Summit NJ for dinner, West Chester on Saturday, and just back from Venice Beach- all spent with our family.
    Stu, thank you and keep going.
    And to you the commenters- you help bring viewpoints to the table- Thank you.

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